The Bull Speaks!

Therapy.

There are all kinds of therapy for all kinds of issues. I know. I’ve had more than my share.

I’ve been bent and twisted on a chiropractor’s table. I’ve been steamed to near lobster perfection in many a sweat lodge. I’ve been made to look much like an escapee from a Clive Barker flick during acupuncture. There have been countless types of drug and vitamin therapies none of which helped my disabilities in the least. Most only made some other part of me go wierd until the therapy ended.

The depression that all of this brought is treated by its very own list of therapies. But this is where The Bull decided to get off the train. I *have* to take a handful of meds twice everyday and I had no desire to add one more to screw around with my thought processes. Yep, by the time I reached this point I *was* suicidal. Who wouldn’t be? It was a messed up way to be thinking and I knew it to be so. Still, I couldn’t bring myself to swallow even one more pill. Instead I asked the V.A., to assign me a pshrink, even if it was an intern. Just someone to bitch at/with. Someone neutral. Someone with no agenda. The V.A. agreed and all was well.

Now I’m married, with three more kids – all under 5, with even more physical issues and all the old ones as well. How do I handle it? I talk. I talk with my wife continually and to others when I can. But during those sleepless hours during the long, dark, lonely nights, I have this blog – and you, the Reader.

The Bull Speaks! really is a labor of love. Through these many lines of code I’ve found a means of keeping a pain-med saturated mind functional, a means of entertainment, and best of all – a pain-free, low-cost, method of mental therapy. So, I write when the body allows and I think about it when I’m alone. At every chance I try new things in hopes of making your visit enjoyable. So do not be surprised at the occassional hour or so of down-time as I repair some goof. Remember, I’m as new to code as I am a veteran to pain.

The Bull.  

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I was zipping through the headlines today when I saw one about a ‘high-ranking’ Al Qaeda thug putting out a tape bitching about the treatment of Muslims by the U.S.of A.
Here’s a bit of it…..

CAIRO, Egypt �??
Top Usama bin Laden lieutenant Ayman Al-Zawahiri vowed in a videotape excerpt shown Monday to continue fighting the United States until its policies change.

…snip…

He advised the Americans to choose between one of two things: “Either you choose to treat us with respect and based on an exchange of interests … or we will continue to fight you until you change your policies.”

Well, I guess everyone has got his/her point of view on religious tolerance. Mine is pretty darned liberal. (It has to be when you’re a Pagan living in the Deep South!) But let me ask the Islamic terrorist this: How, exactly, do you expect to gain ‘repect’ for Islam when you defile its name and dishonor the teachings of the prophets with the murder of innocent men, women and children? And how can you claim righteousness when you stand behind innocents when you fight, using the very people you claim to be fighting for as human shields? You wish others to show ‘respect’ of your faith, then you use your holy places as armories and fire bases, only to whine “Foul American!” when we return fire into that place of worship. Where is your respect of Islam? It appears to this child that you have no concept, or have lost the concept, of respect for your own faith, your people, and the world at large. Worst of all, you have lost all respect for yourself.

To my Muslim readers I ask this: You claim that the terrorist portion of your faith is but a small misguided portion of your faith. Very well, I will accept your word on this. Now, since it is established that extremist are a tiny minority, why have you not eradicated this element of your society that stands to bring down you all? How long do you expect your fellow man to tolerate these attacks? Granted, Governments have taken actions against other governments and against specific groups. However, there is a point where the citizens of the world at large will have had enough of the actions of this ‘tiny minority’. On that day, Muslims – all Muslims – will face the wrath of a most unruly mob. I fear that if that day is allowed to come it will be your innocent men, your innocent women, and your innocent children who will suffer.

I implore you, the Children of Islam, to regain control of yourselves as a people while the world agrees with you about the ‘tiny minority’. Do not let this become, in fact, another Crusade. Time changes many things. The Muslim people have a grand history and stand to have an even grander future if you will join with the other children of this World to work for peace through peaceful means. Yet, you can in no way expect us to continue to tolerate terror and murder flowing freely in the name of any faith. Even yours.

Respect can not be gained at the point of a sword.

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When I read this I laughed until I hurt. My ribs are sore now…
~M*

‘CANADA BUSY SENDING BACK BUSH-DODGERS’ by Joe Blundo

The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The re-election of President Bush is prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they’ll soon be required to hunt, pray and agree with Bill O’Reilly.

Canadian border farmers say it’s not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their land at night. “I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn,” said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry.

“He asked if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I hadn’t any, he left. Didn’t even get a chance to show him my screenplay,eh?” In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. “Not real effective,” he said. “The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn’t give milk.”

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves. “A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions,” an Ontario border patrolman said. “I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though.”

When liberals are caught, they’re sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Bush administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR.

In the days since the election, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Immigration Canada authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers. “If they can’t identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age,” an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies. “I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can’t support them,” an Ottawa resident said. “How many art-history majors does one country need?”

In an effort to ease tensions betwixt the US and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close to Cheney said. “We’re going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The president is determined to reach out.”

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Sometimes there are days when the pain isn’t quite so bad.
Sometimes there are days when the stiffness isn’t so intense.

But it is darned rare when both things happen on the same day. But when these days do occur there is simply no way to not get out of the house and enjoy it while it last. Even though the cost will be a sleepless night following and perhaps a bad day coming. Yesterday started with a hugely stiff neck from attempting to help my father-in-law install a new ceiling fan in our bedroom, (The old one had developed a short that zapped Beth badly when she reached for the chain-pull.) While the kids were taking their mid-day nap I managed to turn in exactly the wrong, or perhaps – right, way. With a massive SNAP! my neck gave way and limbered right up. Oh, no miracle here… just loosened up to it’s normal level. Pain was much less as well.

When the munchkins awoke we headed right out to the backyard with the Shih-Tzus in tow. My Gods, but we had fun! We played truck, we played tractor, we played in the playhouse, and we played under the tarp we set up some days ago.

The point is that we played. Turns out I needed it more than the kids did at the time. And it simply added to the bond I’m building with these kids. Two of the three have been calling me “Daddy” for quite some time, but it is actually doing things with them that will make the difference between ‘calling’ me Daddy and ‘thinking’ of me as Daddy. All I want is to be the best father possible.

~M*  

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It isn’t a huge start. Heck, it really isn’t the start. Especially when compared to Massachusetts & Vermont. However, the Domestic Partnership and Responsibilities Act does have the overwhelming support of the citizens in California and isn’t near as likely to bring on a full-scale frontal assault from the Xtian Fundies as Massachusetts’ gay marriage law while going further than Vermont’s tax law.

Hopefully we, as a nation, are coming closer to a day when we can, and will, keep our collective nose – and our government – out of people’s bedrooms. I know no one asked me, but since when is it any of our business what any two, or more, consenting adults do in their own home? Further, if you’re seeking something ‘deviant’ to thrill your sense of shock, look no further than your local Xtian fundie minister. To date, I’ve not found so much as one without some HUGE skeletons rattling around the house.

Some guy once said, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone”. Note how the guy didn’t say, “He who has not been caught yet at his sin of choice may cast the first stone”.
Here’s more on the story, courtesy of Fox News.

LZIL: file not found:
/home/omar/public_html/wp-content/gay_couples.jpg

LOS ANGELES �?? A new state law in California allows gay and lesbian couples nearly all the same rights and benefits of married spouses if they choose to sign up with a state domestic partner registry.

For thousands of same-sex couples in the state, that means legal recognitions they have long dreamed about having.

California Assemblywoman Jackie Goldberg, author of the Domestic Partnership and Responsibilities Act, calls the measure historic. It grants same-sex couples everything from insurance benefits to adoption rights, but also adds responsibilities like their partner’s debt.

Some legal experts, however, say the registry won’t be beneficial for everyone and that several thousand people have already removed their names from the list because they’re concerned about losing important financial benefits.

Yet proponents insist that joining is an important step in the march for gay rights and that in most cases, the pros will outweigh the cons for people in committed relationships.

While this law, which goes into effect in January, is one of the most far-reaching in the country in terms of gay rights, it doesn’t go as far as some other states’. Massachusetts, for example, allows for same-sex marriage and Vermont permits same-sex couples to file joint tax returns.

And the answer is “Yes. I, as a Conservative American, do support Equal Rights for Gays and Lesbians just as Gays and Lesbians have always supported my – and your – Rights as an American Citizen.
~Rev. Mark T. Jones, H.P.
American Veteran  

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Well, that last post mentioned a lesson. The lesson is as follows:

If you are using WordPress – and I *do* recommend it – make sure you do not have excess spaces in your ’spam words’ list. They will cause issues!

At any rate, you may now comment as you wish!

Lesson learned!

~M*  

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Yes. It’s true.
I hate spammers – of all types. But most of all I dislike those comment spammers that attempt to wreck my blog for their finacial gain – or of sheer vileness.

Problems with these bums has left me searching for various ways to combat the act. I’m trying a couple of different methods. One that I had the most hope for was/is ‘Authimage’
This plug-in/hack, (it seems to be a bit of both), displays an image with some random text that the commenter has to enter in order for their comment to go through. Provided, that is, that it works. So far it has not for me. Only caused errors in my comments area. My fault, I’m sure. I admit that I’m over my head in some of this coding, and I’m finding out how finicky PHP can be. But no risk- no gain. I have to learn somehow, and since no one has jumped over to give me free leasons, I’m teaching myself. Slowly.

So, if you leave a comment and afterwards see a page long list of errors, just chuckle to yourself and say: “Another lesson learned, Omar. Another lesson learned.”  

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Amazed again…..
Perhaps I just don’t get enough sleep. I seem to be amazed a lot lately.

As strange as it may sound, I had not, until just now, viewed this site in Internet Explorer.
When I moved to WordPress was the same day I had discovered Firefox and ,frankly, I hadn’t looked back.

Yes, Firefox is just that good.

Oh, I knew there were some differences. But I had not realized the differences in this blog until just now. It is so much easier to read in Firefox. I’m still plenty new to all of this publishing stuff and will endeavor to make everything comparable across browsers. Our Family Page, On Dog River, was built when all I had was IE6. There are issues there that I need to address for it to display properly on Firefox. Change it I will. And, if I’m forced to choose, I’ll change it to work best in Firefox as it *is* the superior browser.

In the mean time, I do apologize for any difficulties you have in reading this blog in IE and oddities of layout when viewed in that browser. Repair methods *will* eventually be discovered by Yours Truly as I slog through a swamp of information – learning code as I go.
Feel free to submit any suggestions directly to me. All advice is welcome.
~M*  

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Comments are back.

…at least I think….
~M*  

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Interesting term, ‘Thankfulness’.
It’s odd how one’s view on the subject can change over time. How it can expand and contract over time. Mine has.

I always looked forward to Thanksgiving so much more than any of the other ’standard’ holidays. It was a time for Family. Unlike Yule/Christmas which are so commercialised now and never fails to push me deep into depression, and New Years which is totally meaningless to me, (as a Wiccan, my new year began back at Samhain/Halloween), Thanksgiving is the only time for pure family enjoyment with no real pressure. After the busy Samhain season the time of Thanksgiving was a breath of fresh air – the last until the Rites of Spring.

Yet the first two Thanksgivings of the new Millinium were days that I struggled with whether or not Life was worth continuing. My family was shattered by divorce, and my pain had reached horrid levels. The battle with my spinal issues had also began by this point.

Thanksgiving 2003 is pretty much a blur to me.
I was still very new to this town, this family, heck – this relationship. The odds were stacked miserably against me. With the exception of Beth, the general feeling towards me was extremely hostile. Maybe Erin was neutral. But even she had her doubts. I suppose I can see their side of things. Here is Beth – abandoned by her husband of eight years. Indeed, her high school sweetheart. Abandoned with a toddler daughter and new-born twin boys. Obviously she was struggling with Life. Then suddenly I was here. They had little-to-no notice that Beth was even interested in anyone new. Much less a big, bald mountain man – complete with tattoos, piercings (including facial ones), and a tendancy to carry knives openly on his belt. Disabled too. Definately not looking like anyone in which Beth would ever be interested. Then they found out that I wasn’t even a Christian, but rather a Witch – right here in Mobile, AL. Ouch! You know that had to sting a bit.

That brings us to today, Thanksgiving 2004.
If you’ve kept up with my post lately then you are aware of the recent family drama – once again, because I don’t conform, and refuse to conform, to the Alabama norm. This is a problem mainly with my father-in-law’s side. Well, much to our surprise, and extreme happiness, my father-in-law doesn’t share his families views on me. Well, not entirely. While he doesn’t like my appearance – and especially dislikes my faith – he knows that his daughter is happy and that I’m doing my level best to be a great father to his grandchildren. Strangely, despite these views of his we see eye-to-eye on most things. He and I agree to disagree on certain subjects and get along nicely.

And then there is Beth’s mom’s family. They, too, are aware of my differences. Yet rather than throw away family by rigid, dogmatic views. They chose to welcome me into the Family as Beth’s husband. Today’s family dinner with the extended family was more than good. It was a fantastic feeling of comfort and joy – a feeling of ‘Family’. That is something I have missed. I may have always enjoyed my family, but even I could not know the agony of of losing my family until it happened.
And today I was welcomed, repeat: welcomed, into this, my new Family. And very Thankful.

It’s good to be home.

Happy Thanksgiving!
~M*  

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