It was another long night. Happily the first in a long while, though. For most of it I just dealt with the pain and stayed in bed with Lady Beth sleeping quietly next to me. Finally, I gave in and hit the kitchen for some milk and narcotics at 0400. I read the news (nothing good as usual), let the dogs out and the cat in, and checked on the snakes. The neighbors will be happy to note that everyone was snug in their tanks. Lastly, I crawled back into the sack so my bride would awake with the illusion, at least, that I was with her through out the night. Lady Beth is a fine woman – in every sense of the word. Far better than this man deserves. At last I am happy. Even more, I am content.
The same can be said about many of the people in my life. Most of them are far better friends than I, or anyone, deserves. I think about them all daily. Actually, several times a day. On those nights when sleep illudes me, like last night, I have time to give myself over to my memories of time spent with those friends and the blessings they bestowed upon me. I am fortunate that my wife is secure enough in our Love that she does not fear those memories of mine, nor those friendships. Even those that were more intimate than most friendships. Frankly, if it were not for the Love, Loyalty, and Devotion of several of these friends I don’t think I’d be here now. Yes, they saved The Bull. There was a time – not so long ago – that I was broke and broken of body, mind, and spirit. I was facing a surgery that was more dangerous than I care to think about after a long period of recovery from two other surgeries. Several women banded together to pull me through. Let me tell you – as much as I dare – about them.
There was Cindy, as strong-willed as she is beautiful. She and her family gave me a home when I had nothing. How am I supposed to repay that? I can’t. I’ll go to my grave owing, and loving, that Clan. Natalie, always anchored in the real world. She is always there with a hug, a laugh, and practical advice. Not to mention pizza. Melody, those green eyes can pierce a heart at a glance, and her Love is a force of Nature. Even from across the Sea. Cathy, who’s laugh is like the ringing of the finest crystal. Her hugs can warm the coldest heart. I, no, “We” miss her company. Liz, an old soul in a body with the beauty of a Goddess. How could I not love her? She knew my heart yet seemed to know my future as well and turned me in the right direction. Gail, I don’t think I can possibly put into words all she has meant to me over the years. Strong, intellegent, caring, yet tolerating no foolishness – especially from me. Many times I’ve gone to her for solice only to get what I really needed – a kick in the ass!
Oh, I suspect The Bull will catch some grief over this post. Not from Lady Beth, who knows all but one of these friends herself and knows how deeply I love her, but from these women I honor here. Sadly, time and circumstance has damaged and weakened the bonds between some of us. I suppose that with age comes the knowledge that real wealth is not measured in gold, but in friends. I know that I am poorer than I once was in that regard. I would see that cured, if possible, before this year is gone.
I too think quite often of the times and of the same friends. I think of how I am glad to be near the ones that I am near, how I miss the bonds that are loosened or broken, how I miss the ones that are close but not near. I miss you, Sir Omar and Lady Beth. I love you both dearly. And it warms the heart to see the words happy and content coming from you.
Love always…
Liz
I think it’s important to hold on tight to the fond memories that we gain through this life. Mostly, I think it’s important to let the fond memories over-shadow the things that give us pain. For I as one believe that pain should be and must be temporary in order to live a full life, a happy life.
I am happy to know that you have found your Love and are one happy Bull! Kudos! And I can say, I told you so! HA! One day, some day, you would find it and be happy and nothing else would matter. Remember?
I miss the old times, too. The ones that have moved on, the ones that have parted, and the ones that have remained have given me joy beyond measure. I wish them all wellness and happiness and I wish always the same for you.
Love,
Cindy