As I sit here listening to Governor Sarah Palin’s of Alaska speaking to a Dayton, OH along side of Senator McCain crowd I realize that these are the kind of days that I am MOST proud of my Nation.
She IS what this Nation needs as a Vice-President!
Happy Birthday to John McCain & Happy 20th Anniversary to Governor Sarah Palin & her husband, Todd!
(What an anniversary gift! 
)
Bull, out. 
John McCain has been known for years as a maverick in Washington, D.C. To tell you the truth, The Bull thinks that McCain is more like one of the Heroes of my home State of South Carolina – the ‘Swamp Fox’, Francis Marion – when it comes to strategy.
What a wonderful choice McCain has made in the Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin!
Sarah and Todd Palin have five children: boys Track, 19, and Trig, 4 months, and daughters Bristol, 17, Willow, 13, and Piper, 7. Track Palin joined the Army last September and will deploy to Iraq on Sept. 11. Palin had kept her pregnancy with Trig a secret as she worked in the governor’s mansion, confirming only weeks before the birth that she was going to have a son who she knew would have Down syndrome. She returned to work in April three days after giving birth. To date she maintains an 80% approval rating among Alaskans.
Palin is a Life Member of the NRA. She has been, and remains, an advocate of 2nd Amendment & sportsman’s Rights. She also is an advocate of a sound energy policy including drilling in ANWAR as needed while we develop alternative energy sources. Palin is also a pro-life candidate that will appeal to the Republican base.
This choice does serious damage to the ‘Dim’-ocrat ticket in that they dare not use the “lack of experience” line considering their top-of-the-ticket choice. Palin is also a Washington outsider, unlike Biden. A woman also brings in the female vote dis-enfranchised by the Democratic maneuvers to put Obama in office.
Now we have a race, my friends! 
“McCain/Palin“. Sounds good to me!
Bull, out!
It is the season for these bloody storms. It is also the portion of the season when Mobile, AL’s weather is most likely to be effected by hurricanes. Since Katrina we have been blessed with moderate weather and a cooler winters. However, it may be time to pay the piper as nothing last forever – and especially good weather!
Enter Hurricane Gustav.
The storm is expected to hit the exceedingly warm waters of the Gulf and explode into a monster storm with the Gulf Coast, and Mobile Bay, squarely in its sights. The Bull agrees with that assessment. Further, with all of the animals we care for at Lady Beth’s Chaos & Critters Exotic Rescue we will not be among the folks evacuating.
Preparations, the serious preparations, begin tomorrow. Postings on this blog shall be light until the storm has had its say.
As is my custom, I will post updates as the storm comes ashore until connectivity is lost. I have, as usual, made arrangements with a fellow blogger to post occasional called-in updates on our condition here at The Pasture in the event that we are without power and connectivity for an extended period of time. Also my custom, Look for those updates at TexasFred’s.
TexasFred is a fine American and a dedicated blogger who I feel I can trust to get the word out. His blog is a damned fine read any day of the week, too!
So. That’s it for now. I ask for your prayer for all of those that have been afflicted by these storms and those that will be so afflicted. Be prepared to give of your time, if not money, after the water & winds. Pray for this Nation as well. If this old Pagan can do it, then you can too!
Bull, out.
Fox News reports…
SAN FRANCISCO �?? A former San Francisco radio talk show host and Roman Catholic priest was sentenced to more than seven years in prison Thursday for distributing child pornography.
KGO-AM 810 Radio, Ward’s employer, refused to comment for this posting when contacted by The Bull.
Last December The Bull reported to you concerning this pervert in a post titled ‘Lion of the Left’ To Soon Be Neutered. The wheels of Justice seemed to have turned rather quickly for this child-hunting monster. Sadly though, Bernie Ward’s case was set in the ‘Granola State‘ and he has been sentenced to a mere seven years instead of the death penalty a he should have been. I’d have even been satisfied with a life sentence, but what can you expect from one of the most Liberal areas of the Nation? 
Ward, a father of four and strong Obama supporter, admitted in a conversation with the woman who turned him in that he was sexually aroused when his daughter walked in the bathroom while he showered, according to court documents. It has to make one wonder what evils are sharing our planet with us.
Doron Weinberg (read as “Whine-berg”), the pervert’s shyster, begged for the mandatory minimum sentence of five years. He offered letters of support from the Liberal Left and Ward’s volunteer work as reasons he should be let off with a light sentence. All the while ‘Whine-berg’ continued to rant that Ward downloaded the child porn for “journalistic research”.
Riiiiight!
“It’s clear that it ended in a dark place,” Weinberg said. “Bernie Ward is a good man.”
[Begin Sarcasm]
Sure thing, Moron Doron. All ‘good men‘ have sexual fantasies about their daughters. Does that include you, Mr. Weinberg? 
Just asking because it certainly does not apply to The Bull or any normally functioning Human Being that I am aware of on Mother Earth!
[End Sarcasm]
Now you know why I despise lawyers – their definition of the word ‘good’ is horribly skewed, and I understand from waitresses I know that they are horrible tippers as well…
There is very little solace that America can take from such a light sentence on such horrendous charges. However, we can sleep a little better for the next few years knowing that nearly every evening little Mr. ‘Short Eyes’ Ward will either be looking over his shoulder or be getting his just desserts – prison-style. There is always the chance that ol’ Bernie the Child Molester will self-correct and save us all a lot of grief and the tax payers a lot of money.
Bernie Ward, have fun storming the castle… er, ‘prison’!
And remember these two things:
Have a nice day! 
Bull, out!
I’ve been in the market of late for a new carry gun for Lady Beth. Being a life-long ‘gun nut’ I have rather set ideas of what makes up a good carry weapon. Contrary to Hollywood and rapping thug-wanna-be’s likes to consider “cool”, The Bull does not go in for the high capacity, “spray & pray” weapons.
I go for accuracy over capacity, projectile caliber over projectile velocity, and weapon reliability over reload speed. All of that points more towards revolvers than the plethora of semi-auto pistols on the market today. Hence, my personal choice of a single action .45 Colt for my personal CCW weapon. Concealed it is, but secret? No, it isn’t. You’d be surprised just how many questions and emails I get concerning CCW revolvers. By far the most are concerning the big-bore revolvers – and that brings me back to the point of this post…
So I go looking for other revolvers chambered for a major caliber round. (A full caliber round being any bullet equal to, or exceeding, 4/10ths of an inch in diameter.) Friends, I was saddened by the results of that search! Seems that on the ‘affordable and really small’ end of the spectrum only Charter Arms had an entry – their formidable ‘Bulldog’ chambered to load out five of the old reliable .44 Special. Ruger has added short barreled versions of their most excellent ‘Redhawk’ revolver in .45 Colt to the mix. It is a fine gun and has made my short list for my next purchase. Though this is a massively strong handgun and absolutely reliable in any situation, at 46 ounces empty it is hardly a firearm for a woman’s purse, an ankle holster, or for hanging in the waistband of a pair of scrubs! Smith & Wesson also has entries – several in fact! (The models 21 & 25 come to mind.) They also offer short-barreled versions of their monster ‘X-Frame’ .460 and .500 S&W magnums. Unfortunately, S&W tend to run exceptionally high in price, (MSRP’s from $800 to $1500.), and even finding one of their large bore revolvers to look at can be quite a chore.
The big-bore double action revolver market is a veritable wasteland when it comes to guns for the average person. What a sad state of affairs! 
So I offer this open note to all arms makers worldwide, but particularly to the American firearms industry:
We, the law-abiding, shooting public, have a request. Build us a small double action revolver, suitable for defensive carry, chambered in some major caliber beginning with a “.4″.
Making the .41 Special wildcat into a factory round sounds particularly nice – it is long overdue and simple to boot! Heck, call it whatever you want! Other options that come to mind are the .41 Magnum (as this was what it was designed for in the first place), the .44 Special, and of course, the .45 Colt. For the most part these are relatively low pressure, low velocity cartridges. With today’s available alloys and the experience of well over a century of building double action revolvers there is no reason why this niche market should go unfilled.
I doubt that the industry will take note, but it never hurts to dream and it certainly never hurts to try! And speaking of dreams…
Imagine a five shot .41 Special based on the excellent Ruger SP101. The Bull might even move his beloved Vaquero into retirement as a CCW piece were that firearm available.
What am I saying?!
I know I would! 
Bull, out!
Saw this in an email from Military.com and took a little hope from the story.
August 25, 2008
Deutsche Presse-AgenturBAGHDAD — A female would-be suicide bomber still wearing an explosives vest turned herself over to police on Aug. 24, the same day that 25 people were killed in a further suicide bombing, the U.S. military said.
The military said the woman let herself be escorted away by police in the city of Baquba, north-east of the capital Baghdad, and that she then led the officers to a 13-year-old girl who was likewise supposed to carry out a suicide attack.
Perhaps a small few of the sheet-head, pig-shyte terrorist fools are catching on. I certainly hope so! Their movement is nothing more than a waste of what once was an honorable and brilliant culture.
I’m not holding my breath, though.
Bull, out,
I hope the title was warning enough to those suffering from arachnophobia.
Our Rescue took in a unique thing yesterday – nearly two hundred hatchling Rose-Hair Tarantulas! Here’s a photo:
All of the pinkish-tan fuzz on that bit of wood is actually baby tarantulas! You can see the black dots that is the abdomens of some of the little tikes. This by far isn’t all of them – just the ones clinging to the wood.
A teacher from a local school had the female in her classroom. The spider made an egg case and guarded it closely. The teacher consulted a vet and was told that the eggs would not be fertile since she had not been with a male in the many months since she was purchased. That particular vet apparently didn’t know about the special storage skills of a female tarantula. 
The teacher had a huge surprise when she came into class on day to find her one spider had turned into a couple of hundred! She gave The Bull a call and we, of course, took in the blighters and will have them all new homes very shortly.
Bull, out.
I am an Alabama resident who recently renewed his pistol license with the Sheriff’s Office downtown. During renewal, the clerk advised me that unconcealed pistol carry was not permitted in Alabama. This information is inaccurate, and I feel compelled to address the issue. I aim to clear up the legality of unconcealed pistol carry as well as inquire as to how Law Enforcement will handle encounters with law-abiding citizens who carry their pistols in an unconcealed manner.
Numerous Alabama courts have ruled on the matter of unconcealed carry, and have always upheld this right.
In The State v. Reid, 1 Ala. 612; 1840 Ala.:
“Under the provision of our constitution, we incline to the opinion that the Legislature cannot inhibit the citizen from bearing arms openly, because it authorizes him to bear them for the purposes of defending himself and the State, and it is only when carried openly, that they can be efficiently used for defence.�?
In K.J v. State, 690 So. 2d 541; 1997 Ala. Crim. App.:
“[T]here is a conflict between the two statutes. Section 13A-11-52, like § 13A-11-50, does not permit the carrying of a pistol outside of a person’s own premises under any circumstances. However, that section does begin with the phrase ‘except as otherwise provided in this article.’ â€??
The Court continues:
“Section 13A-11-73 does not prohibit carrying an unlicensed pistol if the pistol is unconcealed and the person is on foot. ( . . . ) Ala. Code § 13A-11-52 applies only the extent that it is consistent with Ala. Code § 13A-11-73 because it is the later statute and a complete revision of the subject matter.�?
Another relevant case is Morris v. State, 342 So. 2d 417; 1977 Ala. Crim. App.:
“The State’s evidence . . . shows that the pistol was in a scabbard or holster, worn on the side and was not covered. We call attention to Title 14, § 175, Recompiled Code 1958,†which reads:
‘No person shall carry a pistol in any vehicle or concealed on or about his person, except on his land, in his own abode or fixed place of business, without a license therefor as hereinafter provided.’
“It is to be observed that this law prohibits carrying a pistol (concealed or not) in any vehicle or ‘concealed on or about his person, except . . . without a license therefor . . [**4] . .’ It does not prohibit an unconcealed pistol.â€??
†Note that the section cited in the above case has since been re-codified as § 13A-11-73, and is identical in wording.
In case there still remains any doubt as to the legality of unconcealed carry, Looney v. State (41 Ala. App. 582; 141 So. 2d 535; 1962 Ala. App.) puts the matter to rest succinctly:
“Code 1940, T. 14, § 175, ‡ as amended, makes it an offense for a person who has no license therefor (except on his land, abode or place of business):
1) to carry a pistol in any vehicle; or
2) to carry a pistol concealed on or about his person.
Thus, a permit is not required when a person afoot carries an unconcealed pistol.�?
‡Again, note that the section cited in the above case has since been re-codified as § 13A-11-73, and is identical in wording.
Now that I am confident you have been duly informed as to the legality of unconcealed carry of firearms in public, it would be prudent to address the issue of unconcealed carry on private premises. The first relevant section of the Code of Alabama on the issue is § 13A-11-52:
“Except as otherwise provided in this article, no person shall carry a pistol about his person on premises not his own or under his control . . .�?
At first reading, it appears § 13A-11-52 prohibits unconcealed carry in private establishments. However, note the boldface “[e]xcept as otherwise provided in this article.�? The Code of Alabama does “provide otherwise,�? in § 13A-11-73:
“No person shall carry a pistol in any vehicle or concealed on or about his person, except on his land, in his own abode or fixed place of business, without a license therefor as hereinafter provided.�?
A person having been issued a pistol license is not subject to § 13A-11-52 unless the owner of the premises informs said person that firearms are not permitted at the premises. In an opinion (AGO 1984-205) regarding unconcealed carry, the Attorney General concurred with this interpretation of the law:
“2. May a person carry an unlicensed and unconcealed pistol anywhere, either on his own property, on the public highways, public property or on the land of another person without violating 13A-11-52 or 13A-11-73? (providing he is not riding in a vehicle.)
( . . . ) [Y]es, generally, however, “anywhereâ€?? is a broad term. There may be individual or specific restrictions… landowners or residents may exclude licensees or invitees who do not comply with their rules prohibiting firearms . . .â€??
Furthermore, should any county or municipality wish to prohibit unconcealed carry, such an ordinance would run afoul of Code of Alabama § 11-80-11:
“No county or municipal corporation, instrumentality, or political subdivision thereof, by ordinance, resolution, or other enactment, shall regulate in any manner gun shows, the possession, ownership, transport, carrying, transfer, sale, purchase, licensing, registration or use of firearms, ammunition, components of firearms, firearms dealers, or dealers in firearm components.�?
As you are now aware as to the legality of unconcealed carry, I would like to know how your departments will handle encounters with law-abiding citizens carrying their pistols unconcealed. How will calls to your dispatchersâ€???e.g., “There’s a man with a gun!â€??â€???be handled? Will your deputies be educated as to the legality of unconcealed carry?
Thank you for taking the time to address this important public safety issue.
Yours sincerely,
Bull*
We all know all there is to know about that great and masterful, (near messianic), Presidential candidate, Barack H. Obama, right?
Right?
Maybe not. Frankly, The Bull has problems with anyone that attempts to hide their family. Any family! Sure, we all have someone in our family that isn’t exactly up to ’snuff socially’. That is the very nature of Family.
Granted, I have all kinds of problems with Obama. From his record, to his eligibility , to the denial of his Muslim background. Heck, about the only thing I don’t hold against the guy is is race! What burns me up most of all is a story in the UK paper The Independent concerning Barack’s younger brother, George Hussein Onyango Obama. It is certainly worth the read, though I predict that the story will get little to no press in the United States from the ‘drive by’ media.
I urge you to go read what is posted there. I’ll not copy their story, but I will quote one paragraph, though…
He will not, in other words, be by his brother’s side in Colorado enjoying reflected adulation. “No one knows who I am,” he told the magazine, saying he is too embarrassed to admit to anyone that the man running for the White House in America is his half-brother because of his abject penury. “If anyone says something about my surname, I say we are not related. I am ashamed.”
It takes a scumbag to hide his own brother.
Just another reason to despise the Muslim creep.
Bull, out.
We’ve all seen it. Some guy is questioned by the police and either simply refuses to open his mouth or states “I invoke my 5th Amendment Right.”
The first, the very first thought in your mind is “This person is as guilty as sin!”
You do so think that! Don’t try to lie to The Bull! Hell, I think the same thing. But are we correct in our thoughts? Perhaps not. Perhaps that person is the smart one and the rest of us are idiots. We’ve all been taught all of our lives that the Truth will set us free, but the sad fact is that often telling the Truth to the police will get our innocent asses tossed into a state prison.
You doubt what I’m telling you? I don’t blame you! I felt the same way but now I’m giving the matter serious thought. Please, take some time and watch the following videos. Warning! The first guy is a defense attorney and has exactly the weasel-like personality that you’d expect. However he makes great points. You really do need to watch them in order. The good news is that the second guy, a career cop, is far easier to watch and his agreement with the lawyer I found to be shocking.
Now for some slower talk…
I hope you learned something. I can promise that I did!
Bull, out!
Every now and then a truck will pull up in front of The Bull’s pasture and drop off one of the World’s Greatest Treasures – a new book.
Joy! More to read, more to learn!
I sincerely wish more of America’s youth would try reading something more than their email and text messages. (All written, of course, in some strange abbreviated pig-English.) It is obvious that I am a true fan of the Internet. However, the Ether has a long way to go in order to rival the riches of a good library. Everything – love, hate, war, peace, knowledge & escape – can be found on those tender paper pages.
Generally speaking, I’m not overly picky about what I read. Some subjects, though, just don’t make the top slots of my “Want to Read ASAP” list. For example, a story of person’s life as a Christian. No! There is nothing wrong with Christianity, but The Bull is a confirmed, life-long Pagan and has no interest in converting what-so-ever. So when the last rectangular package arrived on my doorstep I was somewhat skeptical when I read that this new book was titled: “Never Surrender” (A Soldier’s Journey To The Crossroads of Faith And Freedom) 1. The book might have never quite made it to my reading chair save that I saw and recognized the name of the author – LTG William G Boykin, U.S. Army (Ret.). 2
LZIL: file not found:
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Wait! Could this be the same William Boykin that was up to his chin in Delta Force right from its beginning? The same guy that caught a .50 caliber machinegun round in the chest and lived to tell about it? The William Boykin that served as the DOD Undersecretary for Intelligence and got caught up in a mess created by the communist drive-by media?
It was the very same guy. Now I simply had to read this book!
William Boykin is an authentic American Hero. He served our Nation well for over thirty six years and is a highly decorated combat Veteran. His courage took him to, (and through), most every conflict that America has seen from Vietnam forward to the War on Terror. Through it all Boykin served his Country faithfully. He remained dedicated to this Nation even when it appeared the Nation was not concerned about him. Even when he was reviled by the liberal media he remained a stalwart American soldier. Even when his Commander-in-Chief, George W. Bush, turned his back on him, Boykin stood firm.
And LTG William G Boykin won.
This book is not merely a story of a soldier’s career, though it covers it well. It isn’t just another “shoot ‘em up” war story either, but there is plenty of action. It is the story of how one man’s Faith gave him the strength to walk tall through the ‘Valley of the Shadow of Death’ time after time. It is the story of how that Faith was tested far beyond reason and held against the most vicious attacks imaginable – physical, mental, and emotional.
Boykin’s strength and cool head while under fire is a marvel. For example, towards the end of his career he was underfire from the media out to destroy anyone associated with the war, (as we have come to expect from the communist-owned media in America). During the investigation Gen. Boykin was questioned about why he wore his uniform while speaking publicly. His reply was both inspired and inspiring:3
“I’ve worn this uniform for thirty-three years. It’s who I am. It’s what I am. A soldier. For you to tell me that can go out across this country and recruit young men and women to wear this uniform, then send them to war in this uniform, and send some of them home in body bags wearing this uniform, but that I can’t wear it here in the communities of this country to encourage Americans – that’s something I just can’t come to grips with.”
According to the text, the investigators then glanced at each other as if uncertain of which button to push next.
My guess is that those fools were wondering if they dare push another button!
The Bull gives this book the highest recommendation possible. It is a wonderful read and is an inspiration to everyone – regardless of your choice of Faith. “Never Surrender“ ranks as one of the finest non-fiction books that I have read since the turn of the Century and definitely in the Top 10 of my lifetime. I also find myself wishing fervently that I could meet LTG William G. Boykin in person. I’m certain that I am already a richer man for merely reading his story.
You should read it, too! Call your favorite bookstore for your copy today!
Bull, out.
It is time for another installment of E-Mail Funnies! You know, those ‘occasionally’ (very ‘occasionally’) gut-busting funny letters you see forwarded to 10.3 million email addresses and complete with 47 sets of headers by the time it gets into your mailbox. Sometimes they are made all the more funny simply by being completely true. Such is the case with today’s offering. It touches on grabs & shakes like a rag doll a topic near to everyone on the Gulf Coast this time of year – Hurricanes. Some folks will cringe at making fun of such events. Question is: What else are you going to do? Hurricanes are a force of Nature. There is nothing we mortals can do about them so we might as well get a laugh.
Today’s entry was submitted by a friend and local dog trainer, Frances Dauster CPDT. If you live in the Mobile, AL area and own a dog you just may want to contact her at P’s & Q’s Dog Training, LLC, or via email at this address.
Here we go…
We’re in the peak of the hurricane season, which starts June 1 and ends November 30. Any day now, you’re going to turn on the TV and see a weather person pointing to some radar blob out in the Gulf of Mexico and making two basic meteorological points:
(1) There is no need to panic.
(2) We could all be killed.Yes, hurricane season is an exciting time to be in Mobile County.
If you’re new to the area, you’re probably wondering what you need to do to prepare forthe possibility that we’ll get hit by ‘the big one.’
Based on our experiences, we recommend that you follow this simple three-step hurricane preparedness plan:
STEP 1. Buy enough food and bottled water to last your family for at least three days.
STEP 2. Put these supplies into your car.
STEP 3. Drive to Nebraska and remain there until Thanksgiving.Unfortunately, statistics show that most people will not follow this sensible plan.
Most people will foolishly stay here in Mobile County.
We’ll start with one of the most important hurricane preparedness items:
Homeowners’ Insurance: If you own a home, you must have hurricane insurance. Fortunately, this insurance is cheap and easy to get, as long as your home meets two basic requirements:
(1) It is reasonably well-built, and
(2) It is located in Nebraska.Unfortunately, if your home is located in Mobile County, or any other area that might actually be hit by a hurricane, most insurance companies would prefer not to sell you hurricane insurance, because then they might be required to pay YOU money, and that is certainly not why they got into the insurance business in the first place. So you’ll have to scrounge around for an insurance company, which will charge you an annual premium roughly equal to the replacement value of your house. At any moment, this company can drop you like used dental floss. Since Hurricane Frederick, I have had an estimated 27 different home-insurance companies. This week, I’m covered by the Bob and Big Stan Insurance Company, under a policy which states that, in addition to my premium, Bob and Big Stan are entitled, on demand, to my kidneys.
Shutters: Your house should have hurricane shutters on all the windows, all the doors, and – if it’s a major hurricane – all the toilets.
There are several types of shutters, with advantages and disadvantages:
Plywood shutters: The advantage is that, because you make them yourself, they’re cheap. The disadvantage is that, because you make them yourself, they will fall off.Sheet-metal shutters: The advantage is that these work well, once you get them all up. The disadvantage is that once you get them all up, your hands will be useless bleeding stumps and it will be December.
Roll-down shutters: The advantages are that they’re very easy to use, and will definitely protect your house. The disadvantage is that you will have to sell your house to pay for them.
‘Hurricane-proof’ windows: These are the newest wrinkle in hurricane protection: They look like ordinary windows, but they can withstand hurricane winds! You can be sure of this because the salesman says so. He lives in Nebraska.
Hurricane Proofing Your Property: As the hurricane approaches, check your yard for movable objects such as barbecue grills, planters, patio furniture, visiting relatives, etc. You should, as a precaution, throw these items into your swimming pool (if you don’t have a swimming pool, you should have one built immediately). Otherwise, the hurricane winds will turn these objects into deadly missiles.
Evacuation Route: If you live in a low-lying area, you should have an evacuation route planned out. (To determine whether you live in a low-lying area, look at your driver’s license; if it says you live in Mobile County, you live in a low-lying area.) The purpose of having an evacuation route is to avoid being trapped in your home when a major storm hits. Instead, you will be trapped in a gigantic traffic jam several miles from your home, along with two hundred thousand other evacuees. So, as a bonus, you will not be lonely.
Hurricane Supplies: If you don’t evacuate, you will need supplies. Do not buy them now! Mobile County tradition requires that you wait until the last possible minute, then go to the supermarket and get into vicious fights with strangers over who gets the last can of SPAM.
In addition to food and water, you will need the following supplies:
- 23 flashlights.
- At least $167 worth of batteries that turn out, when the power goes out, to be the wrong size for the flashlights.
- Bleach. (No, I don’t know what the bleach is for. NOBODY knows what the bleach is for. But it’s traditional, so GET some!)
- A big knife that you can strap to your leg. (This will be useless in a hurricane, but it looks cool.)
- A large quantity of raw chicken, to placate the alligators. (Ask anybody who went through Fredrick; after the hurricane, there WILL be irate alligators.)
- $35,000 in cash or diamonds so that, after the hurricane passes, you can buy a generator from a man with no discernible teeth.
Of course these are just basic precautions.
As the hurricane draws near, it is vitally important that you keep abreast of the situation by turning on your television and watching TV reporters in rain slickers stand right next to the water’s edge telling everybody to stay away from the ocean.
Good luck and remember: It’s great living in paradise! Those of you who aren’t here yet, you should come. Really!
Seriously, you could do much worse than living in Mobile County, AL. Take California for example… Or Massachusetts.
Hope it lightened your day!
Bull, out!
Meet Obama’s Foreign Policy Advisor…
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