As regular readers of this blog will know, The Bull doesn’t have any issue at all about tossing out shyte on those deserving – even if those deserving are the Government, the Churches (even mine), or the Police.
Keeping the above statement in mind, let me tell you about yesterday, and a story of when the local constabulary got everything right despite much interference and aggravation…
The Bull, Lady Beth, and two of our older children were in the van. We had just dropped off the three youngest at their Dad’s house and were stopped at the first traffic light after leaving his neighborhood. Suddenly, there was the screaming of rubber and then a harsh lurch and crunch of metal. We had been hit from behind! Everyone seemed to be fine and with the adrenalin flowing The Bull launched from the van to see:
a) if the driver of the truck that hit us was OK,
b) to check the damage to our van, and then…
c) to see if said driver deserved and/or needed killing.
Man, was The Bull ever pissed off! The World’s Most Precious Cargo was in that van – my Family – though good fortune was with us in the fact that the three smallest had just vacated that rear seat.
Turns out that we were hit by a big, rather new, black Dodge Ram 4×4 pick-up. The driver was a standard issue idiot with greasy black hair, thin facial hair, cheaply done tribal tattoos, who was smoking a cigarette and talking on a cell phone. The asshole didn’t even get off the phone when he hit us! When I walked up to his door and found him sitting there with the window down, smoking, and carrying on his conversation like nothing had happened, I lost a bit of my normally cool composure and lit into him – verbally, mind you – like R. Lee Ermey mashing the maggots in the movie Full Metal Jacket! I demanded that he turn off his truck, which he did – nervously. Then I told him to get off of that f***ing cell phone and get out his license and insurance info for the cops who were already on the way. (Lady Beth had been busy on our cell phone in the moments since the impact.)
That’s when this grab-asstic douche bag of phlegm looked at me eye-to-eye for the very first time. It was written all over his face…
He didn’t want anything more to do with The Bull, and even worse – the Police! No matter what else though, I was determined to carry on going through the prescribed motions in an accident situation like exchanging info and waiting for the police before moving the cars. So, I told the guy to stay right there and not to even think about moving that truck while I got my insurance info from the van. Sure enough, as soon as my back was turned the truck fired up and he was turning to head out on a reverse course down Bellingrath Road!
I don’t know if I should put the following in print. Then again, perhaps I should just to show the Leftist Liberals what we mean when we say that those of us with Concealed Carry (CCW) permits are the safest, most responsible Gun Owners of all.
This penis-stain had already hit us from behind, shown zero remorse, damaged our property, and endangered our health (remember my previous spinal cord injuries and implants that don’t take well to sudden impacts). Now he comes within a fraction of hitting me with that truck as he peels out, leaving the scene of an accident! 
Well folks, The Bull does have a legally issued Pistol Permit and carries a big .45 caliber hog-leg every minute of every day. Moreover, I’m pretty damned good with it and don’t consider practice to be challenging until the targets are in excess of 100 yards downrange. Two hundred yards or moving targets are even more fun! I’ll admit to seriously wanting to put a round into his engine block or even his personal ‘boiler room’. However, the weapon did not enter my hand and I left this moron’s capture up to the proper authorities.
The only thing worse than looking down the barrel of a loaded weapon pointed at your head is the memories of having had pulled the trigger on another human – even ass-wipes like this idiot. Don’t get me wrong. If the time comes that I fell I must draw down on someone to protect my family and/or home, then I will. I’ll also pull the trigger. This particular situation did not fit the criteria for the use of deadly force.
Here is where he story takes a couple of “interesting”, if not terribly funny, turns. 
While all of this was going on, witnesses were gathering and Lady Beth was on our cell phone calling the police and letting her ex-husband know what had happened. Her ‘ex’ is a cop in a nearby island town. She was talking to him when the ass-wipe took off and the ‘ex’ instantly dove into his cruiser and went looking for the guy who was headed back towards where we had just dropped of the kids. Another fellow who had been nearly hit by the perp when he ran drove up to the accident scene minutes later. He had followed the perp and when he turned off the main road he came back to let us know which way the ass had went. (Who said Good Citizenship is dead?) This info was immediately passed on to the ‘ex’ who was even then at the end of that side road.
By now the local police had arrived at the accident scene. Two cruisers. They asked me to try to start the van and move it into a nearby parking lot. I complied. One cruiser stayed with us while the other headed off towards where the ‘ex’ had just found and stopped the perp.
Then the questions and paperwork began.
Since The Bull attempts to be a good citizen himself, I informed the officers of my armed status and offered my Pistol Permit along with my drivers license and insurance information. I asked the officer if he would like to secure the weapon himself or if I should do so. The officer thanked me for informing him and went to secure my Vaquero. He seemed rather impressed with the weapon, but before he could ask any questions there was a sudden explosion of screaming and cursing coming from the front doors of the little store behind us.
Looking back towards the store we saw a white male and a black male, both shirtless, fighting as they rolled out into the parking lot. All the while a white female was screaming for someone to stop the fight before [name not clear] got killed. The officer holding my revolver just dropped it on my seat and asked us to secure it in the van’s lock-box. Then the cop and his partner (an ex-Navy “Bubblehead” previously of the USS Chicago (SSN-721)) went to break-up the fight and called back the other cruiser who was on his way to get our perp that the ‘ex’ was holding – alone – many miles out in the boonies. What a scene! What a mess!
When the fight was settled it was determined that it had started over a drug deal gone bad, and rather than be quiet about it they took their fight into the street knowing the parking lot was full of cops! (Remember those “This is your brain on drugs” commercials? 
) Morons… Well, at least one of them got fitted with a new shiny set of bracelets and a free ride downtown.
That done, the cruiser that was forced to return to back up his fellow officers in the fight headed out to find the ‘ex’ and the “leaving the scene of an accident” puke that he had been holding now for quite a spell.
That end of the story is good too, for when the ‘ex’ got the word as to which road the perp had went down he headed that way a well. A couple of miles later, the perp passed him headed back towards Bellingrath having doubled-back. The ‘ex’ turned in behind him and threw on the blues. The perp, making his very first smart move of the day, pulled over.
Then came the surprise!
This moronic fool was treated to the complete ‘felony stop’ treatment with orders coming via load speaker to shut off the truck and to toss the keys out of the window. The perp complied.
This is when he ‘ex’ realized that he did not have his sidearm with him as he had bailed out of the house so fast. He did, however, have his Colt M4 carbine and a fully loaded magazine. As he approached the truck he wisely chambered a round. This does more than the obvious of making the weapon ready to fire. The sound of that bolt falling makes it crystal clear to the perp that a major weapon is ready for action and that he is the target. While shattering nerves, it tends to make fools re-think any silly actions they may be contemplating. Apparently this perp was more of an idiot than most since he managed to make some maneuver that resulted in him getting a major cussing and feeling the business end of said M4 pressed against his left temple. Reports indicate that the perp became very still at that point and developed rather stinky pants. The truck-driving moron apparently didn’t realize – until too late – that the children of the cop he was dealing with had just recently vacated the van the asshole had hit at the light.
The above situation was static for some half an hour while the ‘ex’ awaited the city cops to arrive and take the perp into custody. When they did arrive they thanked the ‘ex’, (though you’ve got to wonder what they thought when they pulled up on the scene and found a cop in civilian clothes holding a suspect at the end of a M4). Believe it or not, the idiot managed to piss off the city police as soon as they arrived and when the ‘ex’ was leaving they were in the process of giving the truck a very thorough, tear-down, search as the idiot sat handcuffed in the back seat of a patrol car.
We don’t have the finished accident report yet and won’t until the end of the week. We don’t even know the perp’s name yet as he did not have a license. Considering the newness of the truck I suspect that someone has insurance on it and that this entire event will work out in the end. I don’t know what the final outcome was with the driver of the truck yet either. If he had warrants, or did something really dumb after the ‘ex’ left, he went to the lock-up. If not, he just got a handful of tickets and was sent on his way to get clean pants. When I found out the details you can bet they will be posted here.
At any rate, I offer many heart-felt thanks to the Mobile Police Department and to Lady Beth’s ex-husband for their diligence and devotion to duty.
Moral of this story: You can only prepare yourself. However, you can’t do much about the idiocy of others.
On a much sadder note, The Bull must report that a Huntsville, AL Police Officer, one Eric Freeman, was shot in the line of duty on the evening of the 14th and died yesterday at 9:30 AM. He leaves a wife and five children. The murderer of this American Hero is in custody. More on the story can be read at Alabama Improper.
Bull, out! 
